Guy de Maupassant: “A curtain of glistening snowflakes descended toward the earth…”
A timeless picture of snowfall from de Maupassant’s short story “Boule de Suif.”
“Good Day, Mr. Kubrick”: Brian Atene Auditions for Full Metal Jacket
In 1984, director Stanley Kubrick placed ads throughout the U.S. for young aspiring actors to send in audition tapes for Full Metal Jacket. This is one of them.
“The Modern Hiawatha” (Anonymous Parody of Longfellow)
When he killed the Mudjokivis,
Of the skin he made him mittens,
Made them with the skin side outside,
He, to get the warm side inside,
Put the inside skin side outside;
He, to get the cold side outside,
Put the warm side fur side inside,
That’s why he put the fur side inside,
Why he put the skin side outside,
Why he turned them inside outside.
Ogden Nash: “A Word to Husbands”
To keep your marriage brimming
With love in the loving cup,
Whenever you’re wrong, admit it;
Whenever you’re right, shut up.
Jerry Lee Lewis: “Boogie Woogie Country Man”
Commanding performance of Troy Seals song from Lewis’ 1975 album Boogie Woogie Country Man.
Phyllis McGinley: “Squeeze Play”
Jackson Pollock had a quaint
Way of saying to his sibyl,
“Shall I dribble?
Should I paint?”
And with never an instant’s quibble,
Sibyl always answered,
“Dribble.”
John Belushi & Dan Aykroyd take Brian Wilson Surfing (1976)
From the 1976 NBC special It’s OK: The Beach Boys’ 15th Anniversary TV Special.
Bobby King: “I Can’t Win”
Pleading vocals on the final track of Ry Cooder’s classic 1979 album Bop Till You Drop.
Wallace Stevens: “Doc, I just don’t understand women.”
“Why don’t you go home, put down your briefcase, put your arms around her, and tell her you love her? Buy her a bunch of roses and send them to her.”
“What the hell for?”
Harry James & His Orchestra with Helen Forrest: “I’ve Heard That Song Before”
Monster #1 pop and R&B hit in early 1943.
Charles Baudelaire: “Always be drunk.”
Don’t be martyred slaves of Time,
Get drunk!
Stay drunk!
On wine, virtue, poetry, whatever!…
Matthew Arnold Threatens an Illiterate Child
“It surprises me very much that a little girl of six should not know how to read, and expects to be read to. It is disgraceful, and you must promise me to learn at once; if you don’t, I shall have to put your father and mother in prison.”
Mumpsimus
“I will not change my old mumpsimus for your new sumpsimus.”
Tiptoes Trailer
Preposterous preview of 2003 movie starring Matthew McConaughey, Kate Beckinsale and—”in the role of a lifetime”—Gary Oldman as a dwarf.
Thomas Carlyle: “An Actual Authentic Ghost”
“Are we not Spirits, that are shaped into a body, into an Appearance; and that fade away again into air, and Invisibility? This is no metaphor, it is a simple scientific fact: we start out of Nothingness, take figure, and are Apparitions; round us, as round the veriest spectre, is Eternity; and to Eternity minutes are as years and æons…Ghosts! There are nigh a thousand million walking the Earth openly at noontide; some half-hundred have vanished from it, some half-hundred have arisen in it, ere thy watch ticks once.”
Chopin: Berceuse in D-flat Major (Op. 57)
Berceuse (“Cradle Song” or “Lullaby”), played by Arthur Rubinstein.
Dolly Parton: “I Will Always Love You”
Beautiful, heartfelt song despite syrupy chimes.
John Mayall’s Bluesbreakers with Eric Clapton: “Parchman Farm”
Mose Allison classic about the Mississippi State Penitentiary, nicknamed for its warden J. M. Parchman.
Swinburne Hears “Three Blind Mice”
“I once witnessed a practical joke played upon him, which made me indignant at the time, but which now seems innocent enough…”
The Sundays: “Here’s Where the Story Ends”
“A titanically strong pop melody.”—Pitchfork