Two Sublime Mozart Passages
Concerto in E Flat For 2 Pianos, K. 365, III Rondo: Allegro and Concerto No. 20 for Piano in D minor, K. 466, II Romance.
Wyclef Jean: “Delia’s Gone”
At An All-Star Tribute to Johnny Cash in 1999, the Fugees singer covered “an especially vicious, frightening number” from Cash’s American Recordings.
George Jones & Tammy Wynette: “We’re Not the Jet Set”
No, we’re not the jet set.
We’re the old Chevrolet set.
Our steak and martinis
Is draft beer with weinies…
Herman Melville: “The Mast-head”
“In the serene weather of the tropics it is exceedingly pleasant the mast-head: nay, to a dreamy meditative man it is delightful. There you stand, a hundred feet above the silent decks, striding along the deep, as if the masts were gigantic stilts, while beneath you and between your legs, as it were, swim the hugest monsters of the sea…”
L’esprit d’escalier
“L’esprit d’escalier (literally, staircase wit) is a French term used in English that describes the predicament of thinking of the right comeback too late…”
Jackie Mason: “My grandfather always said, ‘Don’t watch your money, watch your health…’”
“So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.”
Leo Tolstoy: Levin Skates with Kitty
“He stepped down, avoiding any long look at her as one avoids long looks at the sun, but seeing her as one sees the sun, without looking.”
Norm Macdonald: Uncle Bert “Battles” Cancer
“In the old days a man could just get sick and die. Now they have to wage a battle…”
Alvin Toffler: 800 Lifetimes
“If the last 50,000 years of man’s existence were divided into lifetimes of approximately sixty-two years each, there have been about 800 such lifetimes. Of these 800, fully 650 were spent in caves…”
Jimmy Buffett: “Margaritaville”
I blew out my flip-flop
Stepped on a pop-top
Cut my heel, had to cruise on back home.
But there's booze in the blender
And soon it will render
That frozen concoction that helps me hang on…
Lamino Easy Chair (Oak and Sheepskin, 1956)
Sweden’s favorite piece of 20th-century furniture.
John McPhee: The Sledding Polar Bear
“Just short of catastrophe, still going at bonecrushing speed, he flips to his feet and walks sedately onward as if his ride had not occurred.”
Augustus Pablo: “Jah Light”
Hypnotic instrumental take on the 1952 pop standard “When I Fall in Love.”
Emily Bronte: “Remembrance”
No later light has lightened up my heaven,
No second morn has ever shone for me;
All my life’s bliss from thy dear life was given,
All my life’s bliss is in the grave with thee…
Charlie Chaplin’s Handwriting Analyzed
“I don’t know what to say, because if what you tell me is true, the man who wrote this is a God-given genius.”
Arthur Guiterman: “Routine”
No matter what we are and who,
Some duties everyone must do:
A poet puts aside his wreath
To wash his face and brush his teeth,
And even earls
Must comb their curls,
And even kings
Have underthings.
George Bernard Shaw: “I pity the man who cannot enjoy Shakespeare…”
“His gift of telling a story (provided some one else told it to him first); his enormous power over language, as conspicuous in his senseless and silly abuse of it as in his miracles of expression; his humor; his sense of idiosyncratic character; and his prodigious fund of that vital energy…of the man of genius, enable him to entertain us so effectively that the imaginary scenes and people he has created become more real to us than our actual life.”
Charlie Musselwhite: “Cha Cha the Blues”
Hard-driving instrumental by Memphis Charlie.
Isaac Asimov’s Auto Mechanic’s Riddle
“Because you’re so goddamned educated, doc, I knew you couldn’t be very smart.”
Vladimir Nabokov: “A Disappointed Lepidopterist’s Ditty”
It’s a long climb
Up the rock face
At the wrong time
To the right place.